Intro. Someone recently pointed out that everyone can be divided into one of two categories. You fit into one of these two: Those who are primarily givers, and those who are primarily takers.
A. Givers, those who realize happiness comes through serving others, giving. Giving not just money or gifts, but time, energy, attention.
B. Takers: Life dedicated to taking. Something for nothing. Lottery players - takers. Constantly talking of money. Talking of selves. Wanting to gain little advantages
1 Takers may give gifts. Usually motive, get something in return. They gave us something, so we'dbetter give to them.
2. Givers receive gifts
C. Talking about general concept of what makes happy: giving or taking?
D. May be percentages involved:
1. No man is 100% giver, all have to fight that little bit of taker in us.
a. Givers worry about it. Have to fight it
2. Even those who are primarily takers may be touched occasionally with desire to help
3. Generally speaking there are no 50/50s. Most are primarily givers or primarily takers.
I. What does God want us to be? Whole message of Bible might be summed up: Be a giver
A. Verses that come quickly to mind: Quote some briefly, we'll look at others in more detail
1. Prov. 11:25 "The generous soul will be made rich, and he who waters will also be watered himself."
2. Prov. 22:9 "He who has a bountiful eye will be blessed for he gives his bread to the poor."
3. Acts 20:35 "It is more blessed to give than to receive."
4. Luke 6:38 "Give and it will be given to you; good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom. For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you."
5. Rich told in 1 Tim. 6:18; "Let them do good, that they may be rich in good works, ready to give, willing to share." (BE givers!)
6. Heb. 13:`16 "Do not forget to do good and to share, for with such sacrifices God is well pleased."
These and other verses are direct commands to give.
B. Every command in the Bible regarding love is a command to be a giver
1. Love is concern for well being of others: That is the giver spirit, not taker
2. Want a description of a giver. Read description of one who loves: I Cor. 13:4-7
C. God wants you to be a giver
II. Examples in the Bible
A. Givers:
1. Abraham: Especially when time came to divide his flocks from Lot. Gave Lot first choice
2. Boaz: Quick to give to Ruth
3. Good samaritan: Concerned for injured man. Takers Priest and levites
4. Onesiphorus (2 Timothy 1) : Searched out to find the apostle Paul when Paul in jail
5. Best example Jesus:
a. Matt. 20:28, "the Son of man did not come to be served, but to serve and to give his life a ansom for many."
b. Jn. 10 What he gives as good shepherd: life in abundance
c. vs. 11, "I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd gives his life for the sheep."
B. Takers
1. Jacob (birthright, blessing, etc.)
a. Wasn't he good in some respects? Yes, but greatest weakness, taker
b. Takers in church. Mean well sometimes, haven't yet learned that "It is more blessed to give than receive)
c. Takers aren't always nasty, mean. Still takers
2. Absolom (flattery, everything, designed to give him power)
3. Ahab and Jezabel (Naboth's vineyard)
4. Rich Young Ruler, Ananias and Sapphira Diotrephes
5. Biggest of all Satan, Wants to take souls from God.
C. Could make long lists: Good project for Bible class, list givers and list takers
III. Problems caused by takers in various circumstances: work, school, will focus on 2
A. In the home
1. Husbands and wives:
a. If both givers, success: both takers, no hope: one giver, one taker gonna be rough, maybe
b. Problems almost always caused because one or both is a taker.
i. I want it my way, I want to control you to do it my way
c. Husband takers: "Bring me my slippers," "I'm in charge!" Wife wants to spend $5 "we can't blow money!. If he wants to spend $300 on golf clubs (we need them)
i. Knew one One, would buy candy bars and hide from family, so he could keep for self.
d. Wives takers: latest brand clothing, best furniture, if not - pout
i. Care nothing for others but for selves.
e. Solution - recognize problem and determine to become givers
f. husbands - Eph. 5:25 "Husbands love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it." 28,29 "So husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church."
HUSBANDS, IN HOME ARE YOU GIVER OR TAKER
g. wives - Be giver Titus 2:4,5 Older women are to teach younger women to..."love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their husbands." In other words, learn to be givers!
2. Parents takers
a. Some parents are takers; See children as way for self glorification, live through children
b. See a lot with fathers who did not excel in sports, push children, bark orders
i. Child may not like it, but tries to please parent. Such parents are takers
c. Mothers, want daughters to be popular, not because it's best, but because it brings glory to mother: children in beauty pagent
i. child does something wrong, parent responds, "Why did you do this to me?" "What will everyone think of me? " Those are "taker" words!
ii. What is greatest concern? How I come out looking!
iii. Giver says, "why did you do this harm to yourself." concerned for child
d. Tit. 2 We must learn to be more concerned about our children than ourselves.
3. Children - takers
a. of course will receive from parents
b. but it is possible to spoil, give toys, We do no favor by overloading with toys
c. Are we emphasizing joy of receiving? Instead, though there will be gifts, we teach joy of giving?
d. Parents are you raising your kids to be givers or takers?
e. How? Praise them when give, give them opportunities to give, buy them cards to send to others,
Take to nursing homes, take to visit sick! That way you will teach them the joy of giving
f. Greatest gift we can give is to teach them to give, be givers
g. Make sure you do it!
B. Takers in local congregations: Big distinction: some primarily give, some primarily take
Taker attitudes revealed in different ways.
1. Attitude towards attendance
a. Taker complains that he gets nothing out of attendance:
i. preacher boring, no one is friendly enough, sees others as having too many faults
ii. "feel worse after services than before"
iii. How does he look at worship services? A place to take, be amused, If he can't take doesn't want anything to do with it. Look for excuses, try to get arround it
He overlooks one of the main reasons for attendance that giver sees
b. Reason for attendance: Hebrews 10:24,25 "And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together..."
i. What is a principle reason for assembling w/others? Receive stirring lesson every time?
ii., we hope so, but that's not reason. Everyone else to be friendly to me? give attention to me?
c. Givers attend for completely different reason from takers. Want to encourage
i. Want to shake the hand of that young Christian, smile to those little kids, maybe a pat on the back, maybe a little piece of candy if it's OK with Mom.
ii. I want to pray for sister who is sick, talk about how to help.
iii. Talk about ways to reach others in community
TAKER says, "Didn't get nuthin out of that". GIVER "How much more can I give?"
BIG DISTINCTION
2. Attitude towards service
a. Takers are the whiners: You didn't visit me, you didn't send me a card, you didn't call
i. Do they visit? Do they send cards? Do they call?
ii. They're not supposed to: They are drones, to be served.
b. Givers are sometimes overlooked: But, too busy being concerned with others to be whiners.
3. When there is controversy: Will always be. Different levels of service
a. Taker: Main concern that he looks good. He's right.
i. Will never apologize, use carnal tactics, try to round up allies, try to humiliate those who disagree with him, make them look bad. Tend to use sarcasm.
ii. Motives are simply wrong
b. Giver has only two motives: Know God's will, help brother to see it.
i. Will be quick to apologize if feels even slightly that he has been out of order.
ii. Concerned with being tactful,
iii. James 3:17 "But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrasy."
iiii. Those words describe giver in controversy. Last ones you would think of to describe taker.
c. They have two completely different motives: Taker - win argument. Giver - win soul
Conclusion:
A. We're talking about the very essence of the faith: love - giving
B. To be Christlike is to root out every trace of "takerism." All of us must struggle. Goal not be 80%, 90% but 100% giver.
C. Answer honestly? Are you a giver or a taker? How root out the taker?
D. Practical suggestions on how to root out takerism, become more givers?
In general; Learn that the joy of life is in giving. Purpose of life
1. Don't worry about self, but others.
a. What keeps us from being hospitable, reaching out to others.
b. fear rejection, feel someone will make fun, worry about hurting ourselves.
c. Look at others, how serve, how help
2. Look at examples of givers: How do they give and serve? What can you learn?
a. Offer to go with them on visits, to meetings etc.
3. Make a list of people you can help, and how to do it.
4. Dedicate one a week to: visiting sick, writing notes, calling sick
a. Take children with you. Get them involved.
5. Pray for God's help, pray for others by name
E. Final words to a group of takers. Those who have not yet obeyed the Lord
1. Word "taker" may seem bit strong. Lost can be nice people, givers in some ways. But how are you towards God.
2. Are you a taker towards God? In a sense we are all takers in the sense of mainly receiving from God, but, I'm talking about the attitude that we have towards God. Do we just want to receive?
a. Receive blessings, rain, work, blessings, receive receive, receive
3. Are you willing to give your life to him: Quite a sacrifice!
4. Listen to Matthew 10:25 - For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it".
5. To leave the life of a taker, you have to give it up. Say my life is not mine. It's God's
a. But notice what happens when you make that sacrifice
b. In giving your life up to God, you find it!!
c. You find out what it's all about, you find out where happiness and salvation is.
6. Jesus says "Repent and be baptized" (Acts 2:38)
a. That's the way you can leave old taker life come to him
b. please let this be your last day as a taker. Give, give yourself to God
F. If you have already become a Christian, but allowed Satan to allow too much taker into your life
Make a decision tonight to return to Christ
1. Pray to God in repentance, determine to wage a war against that percentage of taker in you.
2. If it is only known by yourself, make that resolution to God and your family. If it is known only by your family, on the way home tonight, tell them you want to stop being a taker and to wage war against that tendency.
3. If it is known to the brethren, let us know of your desire.
G. Prayer.
H. If we can help anyone either in being baptized into Christ, or with personal prayers, let us know.
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